well, that was awkward....

Not so much for me, but that's what Jesse said. We went to the friend's wedding yesterday. I love weddings. So since it was two people from work getting hitched there were lots of people from work invited. One of whom was.....Danielle. No big deal, right? I was veeery curious to see her up close, but i had a feeling i wasn't going to be properly introduced. haha. we went to the ceremony and got there late, so we stood in the back. I see Jesse waving hi to some ladies and he points out ken. in front of ken i see this blonde girl sitting next to some big balding guy. of course, i assume it's her, but then she turns to the side and i see she looks kind of old (old meaning in her 30's). so, i thought,hmm maybe that wasn't her. Ceremony ends and everyone heads outside. I see the girl again, from the front this time and realize that it WAS her! Um, why does she look so old? And not as pretty as I was expecting.and Brian...hmm, definitely not what i pictured. being the super shallow girl that i am, I felt like 20x better about myself. How strange and kind of pathetic that I felt such relief. I caught brian staring at me. probably thinking, "ah, so that's the psychotic wife!" All the SBC people start walking out and someone tells us that they're going to Ken's. I ask Jes if he wants to go and he's telling em it's up to me....isn't that how it always is? I was a little hungry and had a headache but I had ABSOLUTELY no problem going. It would have been nice actually, just cause i want to meet his friends and stuff...i always feel so left out of his life. As we walk to the car, Danielle rushes past us, totally avoiding eye contact. Oh brother! I started wondering if they had planned this..."Pretend like we dont' know each other. DOn't talk to me, don't even look at me." Whatever, i found it funny. we started following someone to the house, get there and then Jesse takes off. That upset me. I don't know if it was because he was scared I'd make a scene (I wouldn't.Please.) or he would have felt too awkward or he didn't want her to feel awkward. So we didn't go and I'm sure he'll tell them all on Monday that it was because of me.I hate that, he always blames me.

ok, i juts realized i'm writing a whole blog about this. but this is the point of LJ. Catharsis, right? he gets mad when i bring her up, so i juts write it here. On with the story....part 2....the reception.

we get to the reception and fins a table. I'm sure much to jesse's relief, the seats were'nt arranged.we sit with some other nice couple. The others who went to ken's house started showing up and asked what happened to us. some of them sit at our table. so they all showed up except for Danielle and her boyfriend. When they do show up, I notice that there are still 2 empty seats next to me. Yeah, that would have been realy weird. They sat at the rable next to us. we went to get our food. she was coming out as we were going in and Brian was still in there. I hear him say, "jesse, what's up?!" But i didn't hear Jesse say anything back. he said it in a strange tone too. weirdo. so that was all the communication between either of them and Jesse all night. I was introduced to everyone from SBC but them. When it came time for the "company picture" i noticed that brian stayed sitting. That's weird...didn't jesse say they worked together? Hm. funny he didn't get in the picture.

so that was my night. this isn't to say that I don't still feel the way i do about that relationship, but I do see that i was making a mountain out of a molehill....i think. NO, i know it wasn't what i thought it was, but still it was wrong. so, i still say it's his own fault if he feels uncomfortable having us together in the same room. Ok, my psycho phone calls may have had something to do with it, but he shouldn't have gone there in the first place. I think she was scared of me, either that or she was just laughing at me. Either way, the night did make a difference. I'm glad.